Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

You know what's cool? Yep.

Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

If you are reading this you are a nerd

Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

Why'd The Little Kid Drop His Ice Cream Cone? Because He Witnessed His Mom get Raped in front of his house by the man driving the ice cream truck and the realized that he was licking frozen semen......

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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