Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

thumb_up thumb_down -13

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops