Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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A zebra and a giraffe are out in a safari and they see some humans. And then the cow, was drinking, the man was milking the drink, when the giraffe was going to buy some milk. She said, the was yeah okay.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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