What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

96

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops