What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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