Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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12/23/2012

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops