Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

Why don't you throw rocks at a black person riding a bike..... It could be yours

What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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