What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

What's worse then 1 bee sting? -2 Bee stings. What's worse then 2 bee stings? -The Holocaust. What's worse then the Holocaust? -3 Bee stings.

What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

deez nuts

Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

How you know when dislextic

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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