Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

My black friend love grape soda and koolaid, with his fried chicken, and i dont think its racist cuz i also enjoy the same things at times

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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