- Anti Joke

A black man walks into a bank with a gun. He then clocks in and takes duty because he is a security guard at the bank.

What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

Ted: Joe, do you think I'm dumb? Joe: No, I think you're Ted.

Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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