What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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A man walks into a bar and gets drink

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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