- Anti Joke

I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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