Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

FUCK YOU

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

How do you scare a black man? You dont

how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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