What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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