Why did the boy not eat his ice cream? He was addicted to self afflicting. The blood from one of his newer slashes oozed out on the cone which being wafer slowly got soggy. At this point the ice cream slid out of the cone as it was soggy and as he went to eat it, he found an abssence of ice cream. After this unprecedented occurance he gave up with his self harming, so all was good.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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What did Hellen Keller say to her baby cousin? Nothing

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What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

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What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops