Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Tunechi

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops