- Anti Joke

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

did u ever hear a bird joke "no" hawkword

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

I am dyslexic

How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

Q:What do you do when you see a talking raccoon A:Quit the LSD

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops