Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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No

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops