Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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what do you call a man with one leg? whatever his name is.

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why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

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Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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A van drives into a car.

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John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

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what do you get when you use heroin aids.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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if you don't like this you're gay

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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