Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

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teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

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what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

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Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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