Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a priest are on plane that is on fire. What do they do? Call their family and tell them they lovedthem, because there are more than likely going to die.

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Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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