What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? A puppy, but it was left too long in a wrapped up box without air, it quickly suffocated and ruined the kids chirstmas.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

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Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

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Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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13 =B you just learned something

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Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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Man U

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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