A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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