What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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epic win?

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There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops