Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops