Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

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- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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What did the priest tell his son? Nothing, priests can't have children.

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The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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I was walking down the street the other day And I pushed a child under a bus

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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