Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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