whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

What's just not right? Left

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

asdasdasdasd

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

So a horse walks into a bar. The rancher immediately contacted medical help, and with a little teamwork, the horse was treated and revived.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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