whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops