If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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what did the black guy say to the white comedian? haha

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Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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