Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

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what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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