All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

Who has no penis Religious Believers

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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