Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

Why didn't the tv turn on? It wasn't plugged in

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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