What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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knock knock come in !

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

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Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

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the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

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when push comes to shove, shove repeatedly explains to push that she needs to stop stealing his money and find a new place to live. Push then leaves, allowing shove to return back to his sofa and finish watching the basketball game.

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops