What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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hi penis ham telephone

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops