So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

Yo mama's so fat that after her enima, she looked skinny and rather nice

Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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