Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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penis. nuff said.

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How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

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why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

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What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

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so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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What do you call a lubia chin jew slave? Kia

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A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

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whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, chocolate milk.

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

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Why did everyone want to hang out with the mushroom? They didn't. In fact the mushroom's social anxiety had developed to the stage that he had frequent contemplations of self-harm and is in serious need of extensive therapy.

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Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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