Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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