Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

Q: Are their Jews in Hell? A: No, because Hitlers there

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

Q: why does batman die in the end of dark night rises? A: he smoked got cancer and died.

Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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