When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Death by kayak

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

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Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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Corn Muffins

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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what's worse than pie? alot of things.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops