Why did the deer cross the road? It didn't, the animal species is incapable of having a logical reason to possessing the will to cross a road. ruhtard

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Q: why does batman die in the end of dark night rises? A: he smoked got cancer and died.

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Roses are red Roses are also white and Violets are Violet not blue. Also I'm a realist and your grandmother is going to die soon

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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What is black and has no education A tire.

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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