My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -2

One, two, three, four and five

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops