A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

woman's rights

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

You're so sweet I have diabetes

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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