What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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