Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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Whats worse than a man who has had a hard day at work, he goes to a bar and gets drunk, he goes home and beats his wife? I his wife was fat and had cancer

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

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What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

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why did matt die? He had cancer

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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