Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Joke- Blah Blah Blah, punch line -LOL -Shut the hell up

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

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her: what did your last slave die of? him: syphillis

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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