What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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kieran is a homosexual

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Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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