Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

Who's Micheal Jackson?

Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

It's likely that very few people will read this.

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...