What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

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Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? By grounding her.

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Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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