How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

thumb_up thumb_down -16

k

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

ecks! why zee?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q. Why did the 8 year girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I have no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Do you still got what it needs to become a better leader than me Nero?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops