Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

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what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

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There were three men in a race: Crap, Manners, and Shut Up. During the race, Crap fell and Manners stopped to pick him up, Shut Up kept on speeding. The police stopped him. Here is there converstation: Police 1: Whats your name? Shut Up: Shut Up Police 2: Wheres your manners? Shut Up: Back there picking up crap.

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"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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